Convo 2: Keep A Few Hard and Fast Rules For Your Sanity

This is mostly for folks who are in the classroom, but honestly, having some hard and fast boundaries for yourself in your space can really help with anxiety and work related stress. But no matter how many years pass, the kids still remember me for some of these rules.

The trick is to not pick too many, honestly, 3-4. In order to pick these, you’ve gotta know yourself. You need to know what will set you off so you can protect your peace, and everyone elses.

My daily rules are the following:
1. Chairs pushed in. You get up, you push your chair in. You move seats, push your chair in. You leave class, push your chair in. It keeps the room looking neat, organized and is the most basic form of respect. Call me old fashioned, but if kids know you sweat the small stuff like pushing your chair in, they treat your space differently, and in turn - you.
2. No cursing. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it slips out. So that might get a look. But if you’re cursing in casual conversation or cursing someone out (no matter how much someone might deserve it) they gotta go. They’ve gotta leave the space, have a convo and a walk, and then try again. It is another translation of respect and might take a while. It won’t ever be 100%, but it works.
3. Don’t let kids drink soda. It’s sticky. Children get unnecessarily hyper - blah blah, this hardly makes me Ms. Trunchbull. This rule is truly just for my sanity. I have a story about a student bringing catfish for breakfast, and you should definitely not let kids bring that in either. If you don’t believe me, ask Erica Beal.
4. Clean up your room at the end of the day. No matter how long the day was. I clean my room, pick up the papers, sweep, save the pencils on the floor from going in the trash. This helps me decompress, but also makes you a favorite of arguably one of the most important people in the building, the custodian.

So many of these rules I make so my brain can function in much of the chaos that is the normal day. Reflecting on what resonates with you and setting three to four non-negotiable rules can be transformative. These guidelines may seem trivial, but they form the cornerstone of respect in my space. It's not about a laundry list of rules but rather about choosing what aligns with your values and sticking to them.

That’s the bell 🔔 Talk to y’all later!

Convo 1: Assuming The Best Hurts No one.

This honestly goes for any relationship you have at school, whether adult or kid. I can’t think of a time where I wished I didn’t assume the best, but plenty of times where I wish I did. For me, my patience runs out with adults before kids. Knowing yourself is key, but that’s for a different post.

In the medical field there is a thing called a “differential diagnosis” where you match the symptoms to a multitude of possibilities before making a decision on what the issue is. Using this strategy as a way to reason your way to assuming the best could work for you. It has for me.

I was coaching a teacher on behavior interventions for a student that really gave her the blues. I was a new coach. I thought my feedback was clear and easy to follow. But day after day we still were in the same place. Fast forward to our debrief, there were a bunch of different places I could have landed before assuming, she just wasn’t doing what I asked (1). In my head I made it about me (2). She didn’t want to do what I asked because she didn’t like me for XYZ reason, didn’t respect me, etc (3). It created a negative tone in our session and in the end, I wasn’t able to help her and the kid was still unsuccessful too.

I made no less than 3 wrong assumptions before self-destructing the relationship for her and the student. Later on, I found out the issue was that she didn’t know what using my feedback looked like in the moment because her teaching style and mine were so different. Problem solved, but too late.

If I had assumed the best, been kinder, I could have brought us all closer to the end goal. By navigating with optimism and good faith, we enhance our educational impact and journey together. And you’re just a more pleasant person to be around, who doesn’t want that?

That’s the bell 🔔 Talk to y’all later!